I'm Having Suicidal Thoughts

IF YOU ARE FEELING SUICIDAL RIGHT NOW, PLEASE CALL 1-800-273-TALK IN THE U.S. OR VISIT IASP TO FIND A HELPLINE IN YOUR COUNTRY.

If you’re a veteran suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and are thinking about taking your own life, please contact a suicide helpline and read PTSD in Military Veterans for ways you can start feeling better today.

Coping With Suicidal Thoughts — The First Steps:

Step #1: Promise not to do anything right now

Even though you’re in a lot of pain right now, give yourself some distance between thoughts and action. Make a promise to yourself: “I will wait 24 hours (or a week) and won’t do anything drastic during that time.”

Thoughts and actions are two different things — your suicidal thoughts do not have to become a reality. There is no deadline, no one is pushing you to act on these thoughts immediately. Wait. Wait and put some distance between your suicidal thoughts and suicidal action.

Step #2: Avoid drugs and alcohol

Suicidal thoughts can become even stronger if you have taken drugs or alcohol. It is important not to use non-prescription drugs or alcohol when you feel hopeless or are thinking about suicide.

Step #3: Make your home safe

Remove things you could use to hurt yourself, such as pills, knives, razors, or firearms. If you are unable to do so, go to a place where you can feel safe. If you are thinking of overdosing, give your medicines to someone who can return them to you one day at a time as you need them.

Step #4: Have hope — people do get through this

Even people who feel as badly as you are feeling now manage to survive these feelings. Take hope in this. There is a very good chance that you are going to live through these feelings, no matter how much self-loathing, hopelessness, or isolation you are currently experiencing. Just give yourself the time needed and don’t try to go it alone.

Step #5: Don’t keep suicidal thoughts to yourself

Many of us have found that the first step in coping with suicidal thoughts and feelings is sharing them with someone we trust. It may be a friend, a therapist, a member of the clergy, a teacher, a family doctor, a coach, or an experienced counselor at the end of a helpline. Find someone you trust and let them know how bad things are. Don’t let fear, shame, or embarrassment prevent you from seeking help. Just talking about how you got to this point in your life can release a lot of the pressure that’s building up and help you find a way to cope.

Many kinds of emotional pain can lead to thoughts of suicide. The reasons for this pain are unique to every individual, and the ability to cope with the pain differs from person to person. Don’t listen to anyone who tells you, “That’s not enough to be suicidal about.” We are all different. What might be bearable for one person may not be bearable for you. There are, however, some common factors that may lead us to experience suicidal thoughts and feelings.

Loss, depression, anxiety disorders, medical conditions, drug and alcohol dependency, financial, legal or school problems, and other life difficulties can all create profound emotional distress. They also interfere with our ability to problem solve. Even if you can’t see it now, there are nearly always solutions for these problems. Mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder are all treatable with changes in lifestyle, therapy, and medication. Most people who seek help for their problems and make constructive changes in their lives improve their situation and recover. Even if you have received treatment for a disorder before or if you’ve already made attempts to solve your problems, you should know that it’s often necessary to try several different solutions before the right solution, or combination of solutions, is found. Almost all problems can be treated or resolved.

If you are unable to think of solutions other than suicide, it is not that other solutions don’t exist, it’s that you are currently unable to see them. The intense emotional pain that you’re experiencing right now can distort your thinking, making it harder to see possible solutions to problems or to connect with those who can offer support. Therapists, counselors, friends, and loved ones can all help you see solutions that otherwise may not be apparent to you. Give them a chance to help.

Even if it doesn’t feel like it right now, there are many people who want to support you during this difficult time. They won’t try to argue with you about how miserable you feel or tell you to just “snap out of it.” They will not judge you. They will simply listen to you and be there for you.

Reach out to someone. If you promised yourself 24 hours or one week in step #1, use that time to tell someone what’s going on with you. You can call a trusted friend, family member, minister, rabbi, doctor, or therapist. It doesn’t matter who it is, as long as it’s someone you trust and who will listen with compassion.

Even when you’ve decided who you trust to talk to, admitting your suicidal thoughts to another person can be difficult.

Here are some helpful tips for starting the conversation:

Tell the person exactly what you are telling yourself. If you have a suicide plan, explain it to them.
Phrases such as, “I can’t take it anymore” or “I’m done” are vague and do not illustrate how serious things really are. Tell the person you trust that you are thinking about suicide.
If it is too difficult for you to talk about, try writing it down in a note, email, or text for the person you trust to read while you are present.

Resources:

Grief is a normal response to losing someone important to us. When someone dies by suicide, those bereaved often experience a very complicated form of grief caused by a combination of sudden shock, unanswered questions of “Why?” and feelings of “What could I have done?”. They may experience a range of emotions highlighting the dramatic personal effect suicide can have and the important but difficult task of helping someone bereaved by suicide… READ MORE

Discovering that someone you care about has tried to end their life can be a devastating experience. You may initially experience emotions such as shock and denial. Sometimes those close to the suicidal person blame themselves for what has happened, thinking for example, “if only I’d watched them more closely”. The fact that someone close to you or a loved one has attempted suicide is not your fault…READ MORE

It can be scary when a friend or loved one is thinking about suicide. Let us help. If someone you know has any warning signs we encourage you to call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) so that you can find out what resources are available in your area. Your call is routed to the Lifeline center closest to your area code. The local crisis center may have resources such as counseling or in-patient treatment centers for your friend or family member. Most importantly, please encourage them to call the Lifeline…READ MORE

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

National Hopeline Network
1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433)

These toll-free crisis hotlines offer 24-hour suicide prevention and support. Your call is free and confidential.

CALL NOW

5 steps to recovering from suicidal thoughts and feelings

If you live in the US and don't know who to turn to, call

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

or The National Hopeline Network at 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433).

These toll-free crisis hotlines offer 24-hour suicide prevention and support. Your call is free and confidential.

CALL NOW

WAYS TO COPE

WITH SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS

1. Talk with someone every day, preferably face-to-face. Though you feel like withdrawing, ask trusted friends and acquaintances to spend time with you. Or continue to call a crisis helpline and talk about your feelings.

2. Make a safety plan. Develop a set of steps that you can follow during a suicidal crisis. It should include contact numbers for your doctor or therapist, as well as friends and family members who will help in an emergency.

3. Make a written schedule for yourself every day and stick to it, no matter what. Keep a regular routine as much as possible, even when your feelings seem out of control. Get out in the sun or into nature for at least 30 minutes a day.

4. Exercise as vigorously as is safe for you. To get the most benefit, aim for 30 minutes of exercise per day. But you can start small. Three 10-minute bursts of activity can have a positive effect on mood.

5. Make time for things that bring you joy. Even if very few things bring you pleasure at the moment, force yourself to do the things you used to enjoy.

6. Remember your personal goals. You may have always wanted to travel to a particular place, read a specific book, own a pet, move to another place, learn a new hobby, volunteer, go back to school, or start a family. Write your personal goals down.

THINGS TO AVOID

WHEN DEALING WITH SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS

1. Being alone. Solitude can make suicidal thoughts even worse. Visit a friend, or family member, or pick up the phone and call a crisis helpline.

2. Alcohol and drugs. Drugs and alcohol can increase depression, hamper your problem-solving ability, and can make you act impulsively.

3. Doing things that make you feel worse. Listening to sad music, looking at certain photographs, reading old letters, or visiting a loved one’s grave can all increase negative feelings.

4. Thinking about suicide and other negative thoughts. Try not to become preoccupied with suicidal thoughts as this can make them stronger. Don’t think and re-think negative thoughts. Find a distraction. Giving yourself a break from suicidal thoughts can help, even if it’s for a short time.